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Author: Tripnik on November 25 2006 Viewed 5090 times. 15 people liked this blog. You can rate it below if you haven't already.
People who enjoyed reading this: room, monty, astroid, Zanf, reehc, implexgrace, papergoose, ignatius, license, cbit, Taxis, 11t1, nagrom, Artsigreg, jbones
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This seems to be a common thing to talk about on here, but for the first time I personally feel like I'm confronting it full on. I've spent so much time trying to learn everything I can about anything sound related, and yet, I feel like somewhere along the lines I've lost sight of what the original "goal" was. I'm not talking about a goal as some sort of end, but more like that unattainable carrot you dangle in front of yourself to keep you moving. I know this goal has nothing to do with technical cock-rockery (which, unfortunately, is easy to get caught up in), but what do you do when you feel like you might have buried that other indescribable 'x' factor?
I need to strip away the layers until I'm completely vulnerable, forget about any sort of measurement of success, and put on the white belt. Easier said than done. Apologies for the somewhat directionless ramblings, but I guess my question is this:
How do you stop analyzing and deconstructing everything you hear?
How do you stop worrying about trying to "get things out there (to share with interesting people more so than any bullshit glamor)" and playing more shows, etc, without giving up on your dreams of getting your music out there and playing more shows?
And not to dredge up a tired binary, but how do you reconcile the intellectual with the emotional without giving complete preference to either side?
I know there are artists who do all of these things and more (or at least we think they do), and for all you philosophical wankers, I know that everything is everything which is nothing and there is no division between emotional/intellectual blah blah blah... I'm more or less looking for things you do when you're trying to rediscover your roots, but you've forgotten where those roots are. | |
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11/25/06
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room
try different avenues at different times
i seem to be on two roads
one is quite focussed and obsessive - with a clear aim to create the best i can - taking and learning what i can from whats out there
the other is a "just fuck it and create" type mentality - more raw and more likely to sound rough - but can surprise me and also is a good avenue for venting emotionality
just be and please yourself > if you are pleased others probably will be too
11/25/06
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monty
this seems a common problem on this site
midi life crisis if you will.
i suggest listening to music you cant recreate using electronic tools.
real raw music, like a guy playing a piece of string and shoebox, or peasant folk dances etc
good luck
11/25/06
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astroid
haha you sound like me. i have one of these creative crises every few months.
i know this:
when i feel that my stuff is good, and deserves to be heard, my attitude implodes and i start wanting money and fame. conversely, when i feel that i'm in service of the ideas i'm creating (ideas and sound, whatever) and that i just need to be a trooper and get the work done of my backlog of stuff, i feel very good, childlike and exploratory.
being praised when i have that big ego is almost a slap in the face. when i feel small and childlike, praise is wonderful. staying in the latter state is a trick sometimes, when you get positive reinforcement, but it's usually just as simple as talking it out and reminding myself that i'd better stay creative and not give in to the bad feelings.
also, making stuff which i think is gonna be "good" almost never works. but when i explore, the rate of people enjoying my stuff gets higher.
11/25/06
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Tripnik
good suggestions. To a certain degree, I think I've taken the same two roads (albeit they weren't as neatly definined in my mind, I don't think). As far as pleasing myself, that's a much tougher call. There are so many different perspectives in my head that all tug in different directions, and when one part of me likes a track, the other parts hate it. Its like getting critiques on a concert chamber piece from a country cowboy, a glitch enthusiast, and a polka master. All of those people would find something they like, and all of those people would also do something differently.
11/25/06
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Zanf
I think its a common problem for any kind of expressive art - as soon as you start to think too much about it, you trip yourself up in self doubt and over analysis.
"Dont think - feeeeeel. Dont concentrate on the finger or you will miss all that heavenly glory"
Video
As monty says, do something that isnt electronic music related. it will break that sitting in front of a sequencer, staring blankly, getting frustrated because last week you programmed the shit out of a few samples and almost cried at the result.
11/25/06
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Tripnik
monty said: "this seems a common problem on this site
midi life crisis if you will.
i suggest listening to music you cant recreate using electronic tools.
real raw music, like a guy playing a piece of string and shoebox, or peasant folk dances etc
good luck"
ha...well, this is technically a mid mid life crisis. Trying to replicate non em stuff electronically is a good idea, but that's another part of this impass. I'm not even sure if electronic music is my bag, or if it was just another thing that I wanted to check out for awhile.
Before I decided to make "a serious study of music", I could listen to things with complete joy and awe. I remember my sister putting headphones on my head on a car trip and hearing the soundtrack to the wizard of oz, and I couldn't stop laughing because the sound was so crystal clear, what with her use of dolby c and all ;)
I gotta go sling some lattes, but I'll be back in about 8 hours. Looking forward to more input. Talking about this shit helps more than anything else, I think.
11/25/06
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dach
I would suggest learning to meditate. Perhaps not some balls of bright light shining out of your head type crap, but something designed to still your mind. Just sitting patiently and pasively watching your breathing for a while, and returning your thoughts to your breathing when you drift off. An hour of that a day will definitely help with the over-analysis of everything. There be plenty of howto guides on the net.
edited: Nov 25 2006
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implexgrace
the reason why we all started making music is because we want to create. the bible even says (not that i am a God-wad or anything) "God made man an his image"
ok..
well since God is the creator, would it not make logical sense that we too are creators?
this shit is DEEPLY EMBEDDED in all of us. some find it easier to express than others. some have a type of expression that requires wisdom in order to manifest. and so forth.
you KNOW why you are doing what you are doing. like master yoda might say "search your feelings"
meditation is also very good advice. i meditate almost daily for anywhere between 15 minutes to an hour. don't force it, just do it as long as you can. make your mind still like a lake, with no ripples.
be your environment.
you could come up with a million cliches to express what everyone already knows.
WE ALL KNOW.
now we must DO something with the knowledge..
11/25/06
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papergoose
it's an ongoing battle. astroid describes it very well.
the trick, for me at least, is to remind myself to enjoy it. I once had a note on my computer that said 'have fun'. THAT is why I got into it: the soul-beating THRILL of creation, the flow, the story, the EXPLORATION. There is a always-present flow of energy, a certain mindset to connect to it, that when I tap into, I create without fear or judgement, yet with skill and care. The key , for me, is to HAVE FUN.
It's not always easy, but that is the only constant I've found.
11/26/06
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license
sorry, too impatient at the moment to read the rest of the thread, but..
I'm feeling this right now too.
I'm just starting to make music again. like, in the last couple of DAYS.
I have this habit where there's something really obvious I've been meaning to do and then I'll think about it every day before I realise that I've been meaning to do it for MONTHS. and that seems to include realisations about purpose and that kind of a thing. like as if an epiphany is something you can leave in the backseat of your car, buried under a pile of bills. anyway.
I guess the one I'm going through right now...no let me pull out my moleskine cos there's a good quote in it that I wrote in like April and just stumbled upon today.
"As long as you derive inner help and comfort from anything, keep it."
there's this song I have had stuck in my head for at least as long, probably almost a year now. I'm going to finish it up because I think about it and work and it gives me solace the way another song I had stuck in my head for months used to give me solace, until and beyond when I fleshed it out ("Louche"). I don't care if anyone else likes it, or if it ends up on some recording or something.
my friend tried to kick me into gear by saying "let's finish an EP each in the next 4 weeks" and he meant it in the kindest, most encouraging way. but it just fucked it all up for me. but I'm back to making sounds because I want to hear them, because I want to feel less alone. I'll worry about sharing them and distributing them and all that shit later. it's me and my old friend sound and that's what really matters.
11/26/06
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ignatius
this type of discussion used to be quite popular in older versions of em411.
I'm glad you brought all this up because it's interesting to hear what people have to say about it after some time has passed and new things have been confronted/learned/discarded etc.
listening instensly to music i like is somehting i really enjoy. disappearing into it.. not so much trying to figure out how someone did somehting but just appreciating it as art.
i tend to work in different ways based on what application or hardware i'm using. someitmes i can't help but write something w/a melody.. a real tune ya know.. and sometimes i can't help but write something w/o structure that has no 12 note scale melodies or anything.. not on purpose.. it's just the idea that hopefully goes into something i like. not that it's dictating what happens but it sort of guides you along based on it's shortcomings or wealth of options.
i like the mars volta's approach "we make music wholely for ourselves to be understood only by us". which i would say is more or less an autechre approach.
but you can't fight your moods. someitmes i just really want to make an acid techno track or a mellow shuffled beat thing w/dainty synth melodies.
also.. the most fun i've had lately making music has been playing w/other people. jamming for a few hours w/hardware and just rocking out. one of my biggest hang ups.. sometimes.. is just spending so much time alone in a room. sometimes it's fucking great but sometimes i just want to make music w/other people.
i dont know if i addressed any of your questions but that just where i've been lately.
as far as the technical vs emotional.. i dont know. i just sit down and see what happens and try to work on things until i'm satisfied. if it's something that's really simple to use/do but sounds great.. well that's that.. if it's something that's taken me all night or a week to do and it's only a small part of a song or idea or ends up getting cut from the song then that's that too. also, if i get the technical part right then the emotional sort of takes care of itself.. it hink. so it goes ;)
having fun.. yeah.. i try but sometimes i need to edit 40 different samples to getthem to sound the way i want and that's cool but not really a lot of fun.. it's sort of like word processing. but the end result is whats important to me. if i can't listen to the song and enjoy it then i can't expect anyone else to.
oh, the bottom line is.. eventually we're all going to be dead. how do you want to spend your time? i want to make a bunch of music. when i think about that.. it reminds me.. "who gives a shit. write the song I want. it's a song. when it's done i can write another one. concentrate on the song and forget about the gear". that's when i feel the best.
forget about succes and forget about comparisons to your heros. forget about the latest trend and who's already done this or that. just sit down and make your ears happy.
11/26/06
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Tripnik
I haven't meditated in a long time, and perhaps that could be part of the solution. It's tough not to be restless. I'm friends with so many talented people, and each one of them, one by one, are starting to get the recognition that they deserve for their incredible skills. Obviously, none of this is a race or any sort of competition, but it was much easier to think that when we were all grade schoolers playing in a crappy garage band with cardboard box drums and an electric guitarist who didn't own an amplifier yet. I'm starting to feel like that stereotypical girl in the stereotypical romantic comedy, where all her friends are getting married, and I'm still the one trying to get a date. To extend the analogy, then, it starts becoming difficult to distinguish who you actually want to meet, and who you're going out with because they're willing. In both these situations, a possible end result gets mixed up with the original intent. Lately I've been thinking that I don't even want to get married, and as a result, I'm having a tough time deciding to date. Music is similar. If I wanted to be commercially successful, there's no doubt in my mind I'd have what it takes to pump out crap people like. That stuff just takes time and energy that I'm not willing to spend on something so superficial (not to say pop is superficial because good pop IS artistic, but it would be superficial for me). So the, what do I want to get out of the music making process? Is it something I use to vent emotions I'm too shy to share, or is it some sort of intellectual pursuit? Is it a hobby that I do for fun, or is it a self-discipline like karate? Music has been, and is all these things to me and more, and when it's everything to you, it's nothing. In a world where everything is grey, nothing is, right?
I'm not so hung up on a concept of success or "making it" or any of that kind of crap (at least for the sake of this conversation), but I'm more put out with the fact that I'm struggling so much to find what had always come naturally...unbridled passion. When I had that, I didn't have the technical or theoretical knowledge to realize my dreams, and now that I have that, I feel like I've lost the ability to dream. I'm going to stop bitching now, because I'm getting kind of self conscious, and I'm also rambling with no real trajectory (there's a little bit of mental masturbation going on too, which needs to stop).
11/26/06
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pHz
time to drag out one of my favourite quotes -
it took me four years to paint like raphael but a lifetime to paint like a child (pablo picasso)
just play
(in all senses of the word)
slainte  rob
11/26/06
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ricemutt
Hey, this is an interesting thread, and i'm glad to read the opinions on this topic.
I have one idea that worked very well for me, though I can't say I know it would work in your situation.
Just stop making music. for a set period of time. Maybe quite some time. Use that time to do something else, or just absolutely nothing.
When you finally get back to it, it will be completely different.
good luck!
11/26/06
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Taxis
I think that might be the same for anybody caught in making music that is experimental. If art is a part self exploration, then art about art (music for the sake of exploring music) might be seen as the act of exploring yourself exploring yourself. As soon as you settle, then you have lost the point.
I wish you all all the luck in never finding what you were looking for?
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