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Author: tantan on February 20 2008 Viewed 2871 times. 23 people liked this blog. You can rate it below if you haven't already.
People who enjoyed reading this: Fredo, mixedtape, DongleKong, ignatius, DrexonField, mechp, Roshi, jogn, atum, mapmap, sAMsKi, owl, filarion, Zanf, Unknownforce, doofgoblin, mlbot, lowlifi, license, molasar, jack123, bb01, deltasleep
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Mild irritation of the day.
Why do dumbshit corporate people say "lets talk offline" instead of "lets talk later"?
Why do dumbshit corporate people say "legacy products" instead of "old products"?
Why do dumbshit corporate people say "I'm out of cycles" instead of "I'm out of time"?
What is some of your favorite / most hated corp-speak?
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02/20/08
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Otterfan
I've never heard "I'm out of cycles". It sounds like menopause.
02/20/08
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Otterfan
BTW, I leveraged my keyboard to type that.
02/20/08
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tantan
did your fingers achieve synergy with your keyboard?
02/20/08
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Otterfan
Fingers, hands, keyboard, internet: an integrated solution.
02/20/08
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Fredo
hahahahhah, you are all so funny! 
02/20/08
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tantan
This is enterprise-wide humor.
02/20/08
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mixedtape
RE: Corporate Irritations
I'll compile a list of several irritations and send comps to you by EOD.
02/20/08
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Bantam
'Lets run it up the flag pole and see who salutes.'
I chuckled when an old boss said that.
02/20/08
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skab
negatives gains.
one of my students came out with that in class the other day. his company has just announced a $20bn loss.
Also anything with "solutions" on the end: link
and finally people who use the words "facilitate" or "doable" need to have the taste buds pulled one by one of their tongues with tweezers.
edited: Feb 20 2008
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DongleKong
Moving forward
Fire the first shot across the bow
Absolutely! (although this one isn't exclusively corporatese, I still find it loathsome)
02/20/08
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ignatius
classic.
02/20/08
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mechp
If you refer to a boring, 3-hour meeting in which you are going to blather endlessly about your pet project that no one cares about and you call it a pow wow, fully expect me to bring a bow and arrows, Mr. Living Target.
02/20/08
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Roshi
Short answer:
It's synergistic.
02/21/08
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jogn
"we need a solution"
i.e. you come up with the solution, and i'll take the credit
we, we, we
i wanna pee on you.
02/21/08
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atum
were cutting back, aka "youre fired and never meant anything to us"
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